Gaslighting in Love: How It Feels & How to Break Free

They say they love you.
But somehow, you're always the one apologizing.
Always doubting yourself.
Always wondering, “Am I going crazy?”

You’re not.
You may be a victim of gaslighting — one of the most dangerous forms of emotional abuse in relationships.

Let’s talk about how it feels, how it messes with your mind, and how you can break free before you lose yourself completely.

 

💥 What Is Gaslighting?

 

Gaslighting is a psychological manipulation tactic where the abuser makes you question your reality, memory, and sanity.

It’s not obvious like shouting or hitting. It’s subtle, slow, and strategic.

They don’t just lie to you.
They make you feel like you’re the liar.

🧠 How Gaslighting Feels in a Relationship

 

  1. You second-guess your memory

  2. You apologize even when you don’t know what you did wrong

  3. You hear: “You’re too sensitive” or “It’s all in your head”

  4. They twist your words and deny things they clearly said

  5. You feel isolated, confused, and drained

  6. You lose confidence in making basic decisions

Worst part? You start to believe them.

🚩 Common Gaslighting Phrases to Watch For:

 

  1. “You’re imagining things.”

  2. “Stop overreacting.”

  3. “I never said that.”

  4. “You always make things about you.”

  5. “You’re crazy. You need help.”

  6. “You’re the problem, not me.”

These are not just rude comments. These are mind games designed to keep you under control.

🔍 The Truth: Why They Do It

 

Gaslighting is about power.

The more you doubt yourself, the easier it is for them to:

  1. Control you

  2. Shift blame

  3. Avoid responsibility

  4. Make you emotionally dependent

And often, gaslighters are charming in public but cruel in private — making it harder for others to believe your side.

🔓 How to Break Free from Gaslighting

 

1. Name It

The first step to healing is recognizing the pattern.
Once you call it gaslighting, it loses power.

2. Trust Your Reality

Start journaling events and conversations.
Reread them when you start to doubt yourself.

3. Set Boundaries

Refuse to engage in circular arguments or explain things you already clarified.
You are not obligated to defend your truth over and over.

4. Talk to Someone

Gaslighting thrives in silence.
Talk to a trusted friend, therapist, or support group.
You need mirrors to reflect what’s really happening.

5. Walk Away — Without Guilt

Leaving is hard. But staying in emotional abuse slowly erodes who you are.
You’re allowed to leave someone who confuses, controls, and consumes you — even if you love them.

💪 Final Message: You Are Not Crazy. You Are Waking Up.

Gaslighting is designed to make you doubt everything — except the abuser.
But today, you see it. You feel it. And that’s your power.

You are not too sensitive. You’re just finally hearing your own voice again.

Don’t silence it.
Break free. Heal. Rebuild.
You deserve love that honors your mind, not manipulates it.

📞 Support & Help (India):

  1. Mental Health Helpline (iCall): +91 9152987821

  2. National Women’s Helpline: 1091

  3. Free Legal Aid (NALSA): nalsa.gov.in

  4. Domestic Violence Helpline: 181